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In part one we summarized communication and individualism in a relationship and the importance of both. In part 2 I want to touch on the subject of intimacy. Intimacy is key to any relationship working, and intimacy is a way broader subject than you think it is. Most people here the word intimacy and simply jump to “sex”. While that is obviously simple and easy to relate to their is nothing simple about intimacy and it is definitely way more than “sex”.

So what is intimacy? Depend on who you ask on what answer you get. By definition it is a close familiarity or friendship; closeness. So that is why it is such a deep subject. Intimacy has many levels within a relationship and can also flow to external parts of a relationship, to family and friends. The problem with it flowing to external parts of the relationship is that it can put strain on the actual relationship. If you significant other seems to be being closer to someone else outside the two of you it sows a seed of doubt and jealousy for many, when there really is no need for concern. At the same time if that person is neglecting the internal intimacy for that external one its not healthy for the relationship. When your in a relationship that relationship needs to take priority in order to be successful.

While sex is an important part of intimacy for many, if you think that is the best and only form of intimacy in my opinion you are hurting your relationship. There are so many other ways to be intimate with one other that will take you on a deeper journey and understanding of each other. Taking thirty minutes a week and sitting together, looking each other in the eyes, and sharing feelings with each other can be one of the most intimate and emotional experiences you can have. Looking at each other face to face with no interruptions allows you to see what your partner is feeling, and sharing those feelings can connect you on a level like no other. Also touch for me is a big part of intimacy. I can feel closer to my husband by simply holding his hand or cuddling up watching a movie. Touch connects him to me in a way like no other. When he touches me its like his skin melts to mine, this is also one of the many reasons I knew he was the one for me.

Intimacy is what you want to make it, you just have to remind yourself that if all you are basing it on is the amount of sex in your life you may not be looking deep enough and you may need to search your soul a little more. Then again sex may be important to you and that may be what you need. No two people need or want the same thing out of intimacy. Just keep in mind you need to understand what your partner wants as intimacy as well, which reflects back to the importance of communication.