binge eating

Monday Madness (publication #14)

Welcome back to another publication of Monday Madness. Not much madness here this Monday morning, but it’s another chance to have another great week. Last week was super busy, stressful and dis-heartening. So I have high hopes that this week will not be like that.

I really struggled last week and I am struggling writing this today. I wish that everything was 100% positive all the day and I could just share those moments, but that is not real. Life isn’t perfect and it is not always positive. I have been struggling to get my head above water and find that positivity. I even took a break from social media the majority of the weekend.

One thing that has been effecting me horribly is my sleep. I am just not sleep well at all. When I get stressed and life throws rocks at me my sleep suffers. I have learned that my optimal range of sleep is no less than 7 hours a night. I have not been getting anywhere close to that for the last 2 weeks, and it is taking it’s toll on me. I just feel ran down and tired, and I am almost positive that a big portion of that is due to cortisol spikes.

I have also been struggling with binge eating a lot in the past week. I wanted to find comfort so I turned toward my old friend food. Now I by no means went carb crazy or dove off the deep end, but I did eat way past my satiety level. A couple of times to the point that I gave myself a stomach ache. I am very depressed by the fact that I let this happen, but I also know it will help me heal to share with you and others that my struggles are very real.

It has also been almost a month since I have weighed and measured, and boy do I wish I would not have. I have gained four pounds and 6.25 inches back. That is a hard pill to digest when I was losing quite regularly and still have quiet a bit of a ways to go as far as loss is concerned. Now part of that gain could be muscle which is good. So I had to keep telling myself yesterday that the scale is evil and not to give up, because boy did I want to give up. I am glad to say I didn’t and while I did overeat yesterday, I am 20 hours into a fast today and feeling pretty good about it.

I’m battling a lot of inner demons right now in my personal life and it is just like all the flood gates came open at once and I’m drinking more water than I am treading. I have to take time for myself in the next few weeks and really start to learn how to better deal with my stresses. I also think I need to revisit what I am eating and how I am approaching things. I feel I am venturing too far away from my comfort and what makes me happy, what was working for me. I need to search for my bigger why.

No matter what my inner demons are doing to me I refuse to give up. I will never go back to a high carb lifestyle. I have cured too many things by giving up carbs. I just have to find the right things for me and the right people to keep me motivated toward my goals. Next week will be my one year Keto anniversary, and I plan to celebrate every pound I have lost and every disease I have cured. I promise to give my best self to all of you, but also promise to keep it real and show you there are struggles for all of us along the way. Until next time….Keep Ketoing On!

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Binge Eating

Happy Tuesday fellow readers. I hope everyone is making the most of their week. I wanted to talk today about something that has effected me for many years of my life, and I still struggle with today, binge eating. Binge eating is something that can take a huge toll on the person suffering through it and there are also many levels of what binge eating can be, not all binging is the same.

First off I have to state in advance that any information shared in this blog is solely of my opinion. I am not a medical doctor and I am not offering any medical advice. I highly suggest that if you feel you are suffering from any type of binge disorder you speak with your medical doctor or a trained psychologist/therapist.

According to dictionary.com binge has the following definition:
(noun) a period or bout, usually brief, of excessive indulgence, as in eating, drinking alcoholic beverages,etc.; spree. In that definition alone you can see the variance of what a binge can be. It is often even used in common day slang as referring to watching an entire TV season in one sitting. Many forms of binging often are harmful to one’s mental and physical health. Often times individuals who partake in binge eating also become bulimic, and have to purge the food they binged. I am very blessed to not have that severe of a form of binge eating, and I will not be talking about that here in detail as I don’t have experience or knowledge in that.

My problem with binge eating is quite simple, yet very difficult to overcome. My binge eating consists of eating and eating, usually a specific food, until I am literally nausea’s from eating it. Then I feel horrible and spiral into a depressive cycle trying to correct my previous actions usually by sever dieting as a punishment. In the past my binges were solely junk food driven. If it was a cookie, a cake, a lunch treat, etc I would find a way to sneak it, and one was never enough. There are days that I can say I consumed around 5-6 little debbie’s (snack cakes) on top of all my other snacks and food. It was my guilty pleasure and I hid it from everyone. A trigger for me to set off on a binge is strictly emotionally stress driven. One bad thing could happen in my life and I would spiral into the darkness and in turn I would punish my body. Then after I punished it I would turn around and not eat for a day or maybe 2 or if I did eat I would limit my calories. It was a never ending cycle for me at least until I found proper support and keto.

Ironically enough keto saved me from the junk food binges, but not binges in their entirety. My husband stood by my side and I went through 7-10 days of pure hell. Sugar withdrawal is one of the worst things I have ever been through in my life. I was mentally drained, physically sick, migraines for days, and at one point I was sure I was going to fail. Then day after day it got easier to tolerate and within 2 weeks no more withdrawal, but cravings took months to kick. Keto forced me to be accountable and track what I was eating and because my husband was on my journey with me we shared that tracking. So I was less prone to binge, but I did have the urges. After about three months into my journey the urges became stronger and I found myself reverting to my old binge ways. The difference now was it wasn’t sugar it was whole foods but in a quantity that no human needs to consume in one day, let alone one who is trying to lose weight and better her health.

To this day even though my health has improved, I’ve lost 75 pounds, and my mental health is improving I still struggle. I just recently had to deal with some things with my ex-husband and the stress overload triggered past memories and events and led me to go onto a two day binge where all I did was eat anything and everything I could sneak. All of it was keto friendly and I am still sugar free, but the quantity that I ate was not healthy and I knew I was eating past the point of being full. Then I turned around and punished myself with an extended fast. I fast often but this fast was for all the wrong reasons.

As you can see it is a constant struggle for me and I know it more than likely always will be. The difference is I can admit that I have a problem, and I know what triggers that problem. I still need to work on how to prevent that trigger from taking control. Keto is leading me in all the right directions, but support is also key. Sometimes having that person that understands and can tell you no makes a huge difference.

I encourage those who have binging issues no matter how big they are to reach out and talk to someone. Find the support you need and don’t be afraid to share. Also reach out to the national eating disorder association they have great resources and helplines. The first step to getting any help is admitting you have a problem. Until next time….Keep Ketoing On!

Monday Madness (publication #12)

Welcome to another addition of Monday Madness! I hope everyone had a great weekend and your Monday isn’t too crazy. In typical fashion mine is crazy! I’m fairly certain if I ever had a Monday that wasn’t crazy I would think something was wrong. I did have a fairly nice weekend though so that was a plus to kick off this crazy day.

Exciting news for me from the weekend. I took a bold step and got a new summer hair cut and color. I feel like a new women ready to take on the world. I decided to go super short for the summer so things will be easy to manage and that southern Chattanooga heat won’t get to me as much. I also decided to finally buy some flowers for our house. I do not have a green thumb but I do like flowers. So we planted three rose bushes in front of our house. I can’t wait for them to start growing and blooming so I can share some photos with you. We also spent some time at our local market this weekend. I always enjoy seeing all the local vendors and it’s a great way to get in some steps for the day.

Not much has changed in my Keto world. I did sort of fall of the wagon the last couple days, but not like most people do when they say that. I did not consume anything that was carb loaded or a “cheat meal”, but I way over consumed my normal amount of protein and I definitely ate more than what my hunger was. So why did I do that? Stress eating has always been a struggle of mine, as well as binge eating. I let both of those things take a hold of me this week, and I am very disappointed that I let it happen. I let negativity and stress of my life completely take over my body and my routine. So how do I fix it? I simply have to re-focus and re-set. So today I am doing an extended fast to get myself back on track and show myself that food does not control me, I control me! I plan to go at least 24 but ultimately would like to make it to 40. I just want to really focus in on my body and listen to it so we shall see how far I make it. May be less or may be more. Check back later this week on my blog for topics about binge and stress eating.

I did have something quite phenomenal happen this week which reassured me that eating a more carnivore heavy lifestyle is the way for me to be eating. For the first time in 25 years I did not get a hormonal migraine during my monthly cycle. My last two cycles have also been shorter in duration and I have had to take no medication to assist with cramping. This is huge for me as I suffer from endometriosis and functioning during my cycles has always been a challenge. Other than a few chocolate cravings though they have been improved ten fold. As for the craving part most of the time I find it easier just to give in and allow myself some dark chocolate. This also excites me to have an opportunity to see what else eating meat heals in my body.

I hope that everyone has an amazing week. Take some time for yourself and reflect on all the positive vibes you can. Until next time…Keep Ketoing On!